Moral Mondays. Marriage: "It’s Not Just About Love"

By FR. KEVIN M. CUSICK

It’s not just about love; marriage is also about sex.

In the current culture war over the redefinition of marriage, usually the first thing someone who defends such a redefinition will say is, “ It’s about love,” and will then commence to quote Christ’s teaching about loving God and neighbor.

If the redefinition effort over marriage was only about love, we wouldn’t be talking about marriage, would we? Two men who share the love of friendship, or two women who share the same, do not pursue marriage. They are content to be called friends, and so they are.

The Church insists that marriage is about sex. When an engaged cou­ple meet with a priest in order to prepare for their eventual wedding cer­emony, the priest questions them about those elements necessary for a valid and licit union. One of the questions he asks regards their physical ability to engage in the marital act, this for the reason that the marital act is necessary for the consummation of the bond of Matrimony. If the intention or the capacity for sex is lacking, the couple cannot be sacra­mentally married.

Usually in the course of conversing with those who oppose the Church’s teaching that marriage can be validly, licitly contracted only between one man and one woman, a typical tactic is to switch positions in the midst of the discussion and insist that “ it’s about love” between two men and two women, and “ not just about sex.” This ploy is resorted to in the attempt to expose the one who supports Christian teaching as a heartless, cruel monster who is standing in the way of two people who simply want to love one another.

Again, if it’s only about love and not about sex, why is “ marriage” necessary? If the plea is that legal protections are necessary for these friends, then there is no point to the argument as there are already perti­nent laws in place.

This back and forth and flip- flopping with those who support the re­definition of marriage exposes the purely emotional basis of the argu­ments. Usually one finds that the person who opposes the Church’s teach­ing on marriage has a son or daughter who experiences same- sex attrac­tion, and who self- describes as “ gay,” thus enlisting in the labeling nec­essary for being co- opted into the social- change movement and “ comes out.” All of this is designed to decisively preclude any hope of healing or change in the same- sex compulsion, which is an absolute anathema to the “ gay” movement.

Parents are inveigled into believing the labeling is necessary for their child’s happiness. Then comes the next step which is to change all the rules in order to accommodate the whims of the child who now not only wants to act on the same- sex attraction, but go a further step and en­shrine the condition in a permanent social status. And what else do you then attempt to call it but “ marriage”?

God the Father did not change the rules of sin and redemption for His own Son Jesus Christ who went to His death on the cross to win us the graces necessary to overcome temptation and sin and thus cooperate with God’s plan for our holiness. God did not change the rules for His own Son and yet parents everywhere are now demanding He do so for their children.

Christianity is about love by everyone for everyone. Church teaching on persons with same- sex attraction makes this clear.

“ The number of men and women who have deep- seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. They do not choose their homosexual con­dition; for most of them it is a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition” ( Catechism of the Catholic Church, n. 2358).

The Church insists — as does God who both founded the Church and instituted marriage in the creation of man and woman — that mar­riage is indeed about sex. If proponents of the redefinition of mar­riage are insisting their cause is not about sex, then they just lost the argument.

+ + + ( Visit Meeting Christ in the Liturgy at mcitl. blogspot. com for teach­ings from the Catechism of the Catholic Church paired with the Scrip­tures of Holy Mass for every day of the week. Fr. Cusick blogs at APriestLife. blogspot. com and you can e- mail him at mcitl. blog spot. com@gmail.com.)

This article appeared in a recent issue of The Wanderer Catholic Newspaper, more information about which can be obtained at this link.